Yusukes Pain Rewritten
by Sorry Im Me
Summary: Yusuke never shows his pain. Keeps it all to himself. Its starting to eat at him. Will Hiei save Yusuke from himself,or will Yusuke end up ending it all...YusukeXHiei,Yaoi,NC.
1. Yusuke Remembers

I do not own yu yu hakusho.. Just this story line.. I'm not making any money off this either..

But anyways, This fic of mine is quite old BUT I though I would fix it up. One person made fun of this fix and I got quite mad at that but now that I think of it, I'm thankful because she was right and I needed to fix it up. So here I am again 4 years later LOL.

I don't remember what I had in store for this fix before but I think I know what I shall do with it now. If there's OOC is this story, I apologize. I will stick to the real personalities as much as possible. There WILL be Yaoi in this fic duh Yusuke/Hiei and maybe Botan/Keiko.

Anyways here ya all go. Wish me luck.

D

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Chap. 1 Yusuke Remembers.

"Mom, I'm home." Yusuke called out as he walked into his small apartment he shared with his mother. When he received no reply, he put down his bag and took off his shoes and proceeded to walk into the living room. As he walked he could make out a figure on the floor. Walking over to the lamp and turning it on he found out it was his mother, passed out drunk on the floor. Bottle still in hand.

"Some things never change." Yusuke said to himself sadly, as he grabbed the throw blanket on the love seat and covered her with the worn out brown peace of cloth. Walking over to the lamp near the door that led to the kitchen and looking over at his mother with sad eyes, he turned it off.

Not seeing the shadow in the kitchen, He went and picked up his bag and walked to his room. He flipped a switch and the soft glow of the over head lamp came on. He didn't have a very large room but it didn't matter much to Yusuke. He was never home anyways. There was light tan walls, that he didn't like much. He though it to me more of a feminine color. Right across from the door was his bed, and the wall it was pushed to held a window. Another thing he didn't like about the room, to bright in the mornings when he was trying to sleep instead of being in school. At the end of his bed was a dresser, on top of it was a small television. Next to it was a closet. On the right of the bed was a end table with a lamp a clock and some adult magazines.

He dropped his school bag on his bad with a grumble about Keiko and being dragged to school. "Might as well take a shower." He said with a shrug, and walked over to his dresser. Pulling out some items of clothing and sniffing them to see if there were clean, he finally came up with a gray t-shirt and dark blue boxers. After he closed his dresser and stepping over then pile of close he created on the floor, he walked to the bathroom.

He walked into the already lit bathroom. It was small with blue walls, A toilet and sink to his right and a tub/shower to his left. He opened the curtain and turned on the water. Turning around and closing the door he started taking off his clothes. Putting his make shift sleep were down on the sink counter, he turned to the shower. Checking the water and deciding it was to hot he went to change it but a loud bang stopped him.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?!" he yelled as a drunk man stumbled into the bathroom. The man made a gram for Yusuke, witch only ended up in him falling on the young boy. "Who the hell are you?" Yusuke asked in a pissed off tone, as he pushed the older and highly intoxicated man off him. "yaur mommss riiight you are a lllookrr." the man said in a drunken slure, as he put his arms around Yusuke's waist, and pining his arms to his side. Then proceeding to put his face into the nap of Yusuke's neck. Yusuke's body froze. Flash backs of all his mothers previous lovers and what they did to him went though his mind. "whaa.. whaat? Gett the fuck off me!!" He yelled and gave a feeble attempt to push the older man off, but the guy kept his hold on him.

Yusuke couldn't remember ever feeling so week, he didn't know what to do. He forgot about everything, His spirit gun, How strong he was, Or even to scream for help. His mine fogged over and he felt weaker then a 10 year old. The man pushed Yusuke back into the shower right under the burning water. Witch was making it hard for the teen to see.

Throwing his body around trying to get free of the drunk man. The past kept going through his mind. All the times he would be pined under the men his mother would bring home, His mom to drunk to here his cries, The pain, The blood, The tears, And how it took so long to get over.

Tears mixed with the water, He could feel pain of the man on top of him. He pleaded for the man to stop. The man only replied with a drunken chuckle and kept on tugging at the broken teens arms.

He felt himself getting pushed on to his stomach. He could here the man unzip his pants. He didn't expect the sharp pain that filled the lower half of his body to come so fast. A scream went throughout the night. Ever though the water was splashing down upon them, it did little if not no help to lessen the pain.

Mentally he felt...Numb. He new this would hurt in the morning. Not just his body, but his sole. He wanted to scream till his lungs started to bleed, He wanted to hurt the man behind him, He wanted to die, all at once. Yet he could not bring his body to even move. The pain was to much to take. As fast as it all started it ended. Even though it felt like forever.

He didn't even remember the man getting redressed, or him walking out and of the bathroom, out the front door. Or the slam the came after. He lied there, face down in the water watching as his blood mixed with the water went down the drain. He refused to cry.

He had not realize how long he was there for. All he remembered was the water getting cold and the sound of Keiko voice yelling his name.

"YUSUKE!!!"

Calm, he felt calm.. Keiko was there.. he would be alright. He felt someone grab him and turn him around, but he didn't get to see his other red head friend with green concerned eyes as the darkness took over.

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There we go, rewritten and made a bit longer. So R&R and tell me what you think. Ill keep going if I get good reviews.

Tell next time. If you all want

ToOdLeS

D


	2. A Rainy Night

I do not own yu yu hakusho.. Just this story line.. I'm not making any money off this either..

I need to make these longer --

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A Rainy Night Chap. 2 Rewritten though

A figure of a teen could be seen moving slowly under a thin blue comforter on a small bed. The young man opened one brown eye, then the other. Blinking one, two, three times to adjust to the light. He sat up fast. Letting out a soft hiss as a sharp pain in his lower back greeted him. Rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand he looked around the room to see were he was. Seeing the blinding light and tan walls he let out a low growl.

'What a place to wake up in.' he though. Yusuke really didn't like his bedroom, it reminded him to much of a room in a hospital..

With a sigh he laid back on his bed, tossing his arm over his face, letting one eye look at the sealing.

Everything that had happened to him the day before was going through his head.

Keiko wakening him up and making him go to school, the principal yelling at him about skipping classes, the thugs he beat up, the lunch he got with there money, walking home.. Then…

He wanted to cry.

So bad did he want to cry, but HE the great Yusuke Urameshi, winner of the dark tournament, detective of spirit world, savor of the human world, did not cry.

"What a great hero! Can't even save him self." He let out a dark chuckle at his own thoughts.

Sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed and letting out yet a another hiss of pain.

"I need to stop doing that." He said to him self as he started to get up.

"You shouldn't do that detective." Came a dark yet calm voice.

"Why hello to you too mister happy go lucky." Yusuke said to his small hot tempered friend with out even looking at him.

Hiei was sitting on the tree out side of Yusuke's bedroom window.

"Genkai is out there, if she sees you up and walking around she will send you to hell and back." Hiei said.

Yusuke who now had his hand on his bedroom doorknob, froze at this information and turned around and walked back to his bed, Not wanting a encounter with the old women.

"Why do you care Hiei, taking a liking to me?" Yusuke said as he sent a teasing smirk in the direction of his vertically challenged friend.

In a black blur Hiei had jumped from the tree outside onto the windowsill.

"No I am not, it's just that I am the one that is to send you to hell." He said as he sat on the window sill, One knee up to his chest the other hanging out side the window.

Yusuke laid down and looked at the sealing again.

Then it hit him.

Did Hiei know what happened?...

He felt a blush of shame wash over his face.

Yusuke felt like dying as he pulled the blanket over his head. Boy did he ever feel dirty.

"Hiei can you go away, please?" Yusuke asked from under the blankets.

A look of hurt came over Hiei's face, But as fast as it came it was gone.

He knew about what had happened, And how bad it was hurting Yusuke right then and there. He knew first hand how the young boy felt.

There was so many things Hiei wanted to ask his dark haired friend. He wanted give the boy some comforting words, but he knew better. He knew Yusuke needed time, and that his words would bring no such comfort. With out saying a word Hiei left the broken teen with his thoughts.

Yusuke sat there not moving, just thinking.

'Why didn't I stop it from happening? What came over me?" He sat up, Rubbing furiously at his eyes. His head started to spin as a flash back hit him.

One of a man holding him down, making him do things a boy his age should not do. The words that were said, the pain that fallowed. It was to much to handle.

He felt sick..

Bolting from his bed , He ran out his door pass the living room were his Mother , Keiko, Botan, Genkai, and Kurama were. He felt the pain but did not care, he didn't care about anything at this point. Once he got into the bathroom he let himself fall to his knees in front of the toilet.

Running footsteps of Genkai and Kurama could be herd. Yet Yusuke didn't even relies they were there. Seeing what room his feet took him to he let out another cry. Something you would only hear a dieing man make. At this point he could not stop himself from letting out everything that was in his stomach. He felt good, like he was letting everything out. The pain. The memory. He went at it till he was getting nothing but dry heaves.

……………………………………………………

Genkei and Kurama led Yusuke back to his room and laid him down on his bed.

As soon as Yusuke's head hit the pillow he was out. Or so it seemed.

Kurama and Genkei as soon as they though Yusuke asleep turned off the lights and exited the room. Closing the door with a soft click and walking back to the living room were the others were occupying. Speaking in a low voice for only Genkei to here the concerned fox asked.

"Genkei, What should we do?"

Genkei walking slowly with her arms crossed behind her back and didn't answer right away.

The older women closed her eyes and took in a deep steady breath. Slowly she opened her eyes and spook in a tired voice.

"Yusuke may only show his thuggish, hot headed exterior , But deep down inside he is as lost as a child. We will have to keep a close eye on him." Stopping in her tracks she looked up at the red headed teen. " The vibes his spirit energy is giving off tells me that this is not the first time this sort of thing has happened." With this new information Kurama closed his eyes and bowed his head in shame. He felt as though he should have figured as much and helped his young half demon friend when he needed it. Maybe this all could have been prevented. "I believe" Genkei spoke up. "That even if he does not show it, this will effect him. It seems that the last incident like this had to have been when he was much younger, there for heeling over time and or blocking out trauma. Now that he is older it has brought back past events and opened old wounds. We need to see to it that this does not effect him to the point were he does not try to hurt himself or take his own life."

With these words Kurama looked shocked. Watching Genkei walk into the living room he could not help but think to himself how he never though Yusuke to do something so dramatic, But then again Genkei did know her young student more then Yusuke's own mother did. Letting a sigh slip past his slightly parted lips, he joined everyone in the living room.

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Yusuke laid there in the dark. He tried hard to here Kurama and Genkei's words as they spoke, but all her heard was there steps fading and his mothers sobs and Botan's muffled calming words.

His head was spinning and he still felt sick.

Tears started to fall and he rubbed at his eyes hoping at they would not burse. Then again at this point, he did not care. He felt week. He didn't know why all of this was getting to him. So much worse has happened in his short life. It was like a shadow was taking over what little light he had in his life.

It hurt.

He placed his pillow over his face and added presser, letting out a scream as tears he had no control over stain his pillow. He knew he would pass out if he left the pillow there long enough, And he would get to sleep. Letting himself hyperventilate his head started to spin and he breathed in and out with quick, hard, painful breaths. He knew he wa going to pass out soon when his body started to get numb.

One last beep breathe,

Then darkness.

Sweet darkness, were nothing is real anymore.

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Sory it took so long toupdate but I have been verry bizzy with helping my sister move, concerts, friends, ect ect..

I will try to get up chap 3 asap.

Please R&R I what to know wat everone thinks

-D


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